From the Top of the Swing Set

This song is considered sensitive and contains lyrics that may be offensive to some people. Please speak to a parent or guardian for further help.


From the top of the swing-set,
All surrounded by sand,
I shot my old teacher,
With a green rubber band.

I shot her with pleasure,
I shot her with pride.
I couldn't have missed her,
She's forty feet wide.

I went to her funeral,
I went to her grave,
Some people threw flowers,
I threw hand grenades.

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Alternative Lyrics & Related Songs

Add this to the end of the song

I looked in her coffin,
She wasn't quite dead,
So I took a bazooka,
And blew off her head,.

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Apple, Philippines

18 April 2015 at 8:24pm

So I was looking for rhymes that had swing in it, stumbled upon this, and thought I had a breakthrough when I read the first line. Amazingly, I didn't realize you could actually put this on here, and KEEP IT on this page too.

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Daddy !, United States

30 November 2012 at 2:52pm

all of YOU BLEEDING HEART LIBERALS get a LIFE ! its just a GOOFY song ! IF you TEACH your children the RIGHT WAY, & whip there ASS, when they DESERVE it they LEARN respect and you have NO GUN VIOLENCE ! my Children all GREW up knowing what would happen if they laid a HAND on a weapon without DADS permission ! SPARE THE rod , SPOIL THE child ! LIBERALS ! you are STRANGLING this COUNTRIES YOUTH ! MAN UP ! I got my ASS whipped when I was a child ! yes it HURT !, but I LEARNED not to do that again !

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Kaylie, Australia

29 June 2011 at 1:53am

i honestly don't think this should be taught to kids because a kid i know sang this song and now he goes around beating up metally retarded kids

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Lol Kiss My Ass, Azerbaijan

18 June 2011 at 5:20pm

this is hilarious

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Sharon, Canada

20 May 2011 at 8:31pm

LOL come on people,, it's an old song made up a long time ago when people were way more tolerant of others than they are now. I am sure little kids in kindergarten are not singing this song, and I know that I loved it when I was in grade 5. I also loved my grade 5 teacher, she taught it to us! Get over it. Maybe if we start teaching our kids that funny songs are not a guideline for "how to kill your teacher" we can start seeing the humor in things again. Leave it up, it's a kids song for kids with responsible parents.

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Abs, United States

3 May 2011 at 12:57am

i like this song and think that its ok because the warning at the top says that it might be offensive to some children and to ask parents or gardians first. it also has a message for grownups at the bottom. my parent like the song too.

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Madmad1114, United States

8 April 2011 at 11:37pm

this is a good song and i love it and all but i agree with the others it is kinda a bad song and it does teach vilonce

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Noura, Australia

5 March 2011 at 12:56am

ok im studying early childhood teaching and this no way should be on this website I came on here to look at songs I can teach the children and was very disappointed to see this song I think u should have a better choice in what goes on this website this song promotes violence and saying to the children its ok to shoot your teacher and with pride and pleasure!

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Jessie, United States

1 February 2011 at 10:57pm

this is funny i like it! *thumbs up*

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Cricket, United States

5 November 2010 at 2:34am

This should be removed from this website for children's songs. Don't you think that there have been enough shootings at our schools? This only promotes more violence. What on earth were you thinking when you placed this on a web site of childrens songs?!

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Bridget, Lake Charles, La

16 June 2009 at 5:40am

This song is sang to the tune of "On Top of Old Smokey." Why isn't that info given?

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