There was an old Man with a beard,
Who said, "It is just as I feared!
Two owls and a hen,
Four larks and a wren,
Have all built their nests In my beard!'.
There was an Old lady of Chertsey,
Who made a remarkable curtsey,
She twirled round and round,
Till she sank underground,
Which distressed all the people of Chertsey.
There was an Old Man in a tree,
Who was horribly bored by a bee;
When they said, 'Does it buzz?'
He replied, 'Yes, it does!
It's a regular brute of a bee!'.
There was an Old Man who said,
'How Shall I flee from this horrible cow?
I will sit on this stile,
And continue to smile,
Which may soften the heart of that cow. '.
There was an Old Man who said, 'Hush!
I perceive a young bird in this bush!'
When they said, 'Is it small?'
He replied, 'Not at all!
It is four times as big as the bush!'.
There was an Old Person of Gretna,
Who rushed down the crater of Etna;
when they said, 'Is it hot?'
He replied, 'No, it's not!'
That mendacious Old Person of Gretna.
There is a Young Lady, whose nose
Continually prospers and grows;
when it grew out of sight,
She exclaimed in a fright,
'Oh I Farewell to the end of my nose!'.
There was an Old Man of Dumbree,
Who taught little owls to drink tea;
For he said, 'To eat mice,
Is not proper or nice,'
That amiable Man of Dumbree.